Acer Aspire 5750G :: Can't Get Laptop To Do 2 Displays At Once

I'm having an issue extending my display via an external monitor (Samsung 23inch). I’m using a 5750G with GT 540M and Intel HD 3000 that uses Nvidia Optimus technology. It's the i7 2360QM version. So it's a second gen HD 3000 I believe.
 
I can't seem to run 2 displays at once.. like if I connect an external monitor via the VGA or the HDMI.. I can use that monitor on it's own (while the laptop screen is disabled) just fine.. but the moment I try to duplicate displays or extend my desktop across two monitors.. the intel driver crashes...
 
The Intel driver keeps crashing and recovering every 2 seconds until the whole PC blue screens. (VIDEO_TDR_FAILURE - igdkmd64.sys) This is when windows is trying to run both monitors at once. If I quickly press Win+P and set it to a single display, it’s fine.
 
I can output to the external monitor (show desktop only on 2), via both VGA and HDMI and the laptop screen is off. This works fine, even at 1080p.
 
I can also output to the laptop screen only (show desktop only on 1), and the external monitor is off.
 
If I choose "duplicate", only the laptop screen works... But it drops down to a low res (1024x768)... However, in the Multiple Displays setting dropdown... “Duplicate” is no longer selected... and it’s now set to “Show desktop only on 1”. If I try change to duplicate again… both monitors go blank.
 
If I try to extend these displays, the laptop screen stays on... the external monitor goes blank, and the laptop screen immediately starts to flick off and on... as the driver crashes and restarts. I see the little dialog box in the notification area saying “The display driver has stopped responding and has recovered.” While specifying the Intel driver.
 
So here’s what I’ve tried so far:
Windows 8.1 fully updated, with the latest Intel Drivers and NVidia Drivers.
Windows 7 x64 SP1 with latest Intel and NVidia drivers... as well as the old drivers that are listed on the Acer site. Each time I completely uninstalled and deleted the old drivers before installing new ones.
 
I’ve tried these Intel drivers:
8.15.10.2342 (Acer site)
8.15.10.2622 - 15.22.54.64.2622
9.17.10.3347 - 15.28.20.64.3347
9.17.10.3517 - 15.28.22.64.3517 (latest)
 
I updated the BIOS (1.21). I also went into the BIOS and changed the GPU setting from ‘Switchable” to “Integrated” which basically disabled the GT 540m, so windows doesn't even load the nvidia control panel etc.. Even with just the Intel graphics enabled... same issue.
 
I’ve tried adjusting power management settings to ensure that power is always at max.
 
I know it’s not an issue with the external monitor or cables, as they all work fine when the laptop screen is not running... Also, I tested with a Samsung LCD TV with the same issue. The monitor and cables work fine with my PC and other Laptop.
 
So for some reason, the Intel driver does not want to let 2 screens display at once. And the way the Optimus technology works, I don’t think I can bypass the Intel GPU and use the NVidia one alone.
 
I tested Win 8.1 with all latest drivers.. and win 7 with a few combinations.. like both the older intel driver + old nvida driver (the ones listed on the Acer site for this laptop).. then I tried new nvidia + a few old intel drivers one at a time.. but the issue remains..